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 Also for Shiro

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Mayonnaise
shironeko
Symitri
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Symitri

Symitri


Posts : 1342
Join date : 2009-01-02

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PostSubject: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyTue Jun 02, 2009 5:00 pm

I found this highly amusing and relevant because her recent level 80 mage has presented identical situations of thought!

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Things I've Learned about DPS from Tanking from http://www.wordywarrior.com/?p=319

When requesting my tanking services for your random pick-up group, please inquire about all of my stats. You may not realize this, but you need 30k unbuffed health and the heroic Yogg-Saron achievement in order to successfully complete heroic Azjol-Nerub. It’s science!

The higher dps you do, the less you should worry about your threat. When you finally hit the 5-7k dps range, just go ahead and uninstall Omen. If you pull aggro, complain it’s not your fault you’re the more solid player.

Always stand in front of the mob. It’s a little known fact that hugging the tank makes your dps higher. And if those mean nay-sayers retort about a cleave, just cheerfully pip up with, “But I’m no warrior!”

If a tank is chain-pulling, he is clearly a jerk that doesn’t realize you need a full mana bar for every trash pull. In this situation, you should demand that he stop after every pull. For special emphasis, you should create a yell macro. If he doesn’t slow down any, as a last resort, just call him terrible.

On the other hand, if you feel the tank is pulling too slow, you are fully entitled to pull for him. Don’t worry, he’ll thank you for helping him out. All he has to do is press some tanky buttons when a few groups start chaotically frolicking towards your healer, so it’s not a big deal, right?

If a tank says “LOS pull,” it’s actually a foreign acronym that translates roughly to mean “dps pull.” And remember, you’re doing the tank a favor by dpsing that caster that’s shooting shadowbolts around the corner, so if the tank yells at you, tell him he needs to learn to play.

If you see a pack of mobs patrolling nearby, you should hurry up and pull it! Hurry, now! Go go, it might get away for good!

AoE is more effective if you begin before the tank can ever fully hit all the mobs. After all, tanks have the easiest jobs; all they have to do is hit one button and they have eternal aggro on all mobs immediately. And if they lose aggro, well then, call them bad.

If the tank asks if you’re ready to pull the boss, tell them you are, even if you aren’t really. Be sure to wait until he pops his cooldowns in preparation to pull before screeching he has to wait for your mana. Again: science!

If a tanking weapon or stamina item drops, you’re allowed to roll need on it for PvP. Tanks need to quit being selfish twats and realize the game doesn’t evolve around them. Besides, PvE players are all scrubs, so you deserve it more, anyhow!

If the tank marks skull, point and laugh at him. Make it clear you are mocking him because focus-fire is never, ever needed these days, as AoE is king. If your tank tries to explain some nonsense about healing and special abilities, just ignore him and AoE anyhow.

Feel free to go afk, tab out, or just stand there while furiously responding to your paramours in whispers. This is just a game, after all. Who does the tank think he is, telling you he’ll kick you if you don’t dps? I mean, first he tells you you’re dpsing too hard and pulling aggro, and now he’s telling you to start dps? All tanks are whiny little prima donnas, seriously.

Link the dps meters consistently. Preferably after every trash pull. You need everyone to know you’re carrying this group, fo real.

When doing a boss, your strategies are always best. Even if the rest of the group does it the tank’s way, yours is clearly better. Argue until they realize you’re smarter.
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shironeko

shironeko


Posts : 519
Join date : 2008-04-15

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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyWed Jun 03, 2009 1:48 am

In defense:

- I do not ask the tank to let me mana up unless it's before a boss fight. Even then, I don't wait till my mana is full.

- On mob pulls where skull is marked & there are three or more mobs, I cast blizzard, but skull is always selected so I can counterspell if they're healing. & yes, I do counterspell even at the start or the middle of a blizzard. (Although, sometimes, my interrupts are slow.)

I'd like to think I'm slowly improving & it really helps that I play a tank myself.

That's reading the post as DPS.

But as a tank... I'll just remind the twerp that dead DPS = 0 DPS.
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Mayonnaise

Mayonnaise


Posts : 328
Join date : 2009-02-03
Location : Between 2 slices of lettuce, tomatoes and 2 grilled beef patties

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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyWed Jun 03, 2009 5:25 pm

wads this?

i just pull all aggro then shatter to the healer hur hur hur Very Happy

or shatter to shiro oso can hur hur Very Happy


Last edited by Mayonnaise on Wed Jun 03, 2009 5:51 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Gallowyn
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Gallowyn


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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyWed Jun 03, 2009 5:33 pm

THIS TANK SUCKS ASS
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Sederinn

Sederinn


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Join date : 2009-01-09
Location : Los Angeles

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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyThu Jun 04, 2009 8:18 am

LOL, satire at its finest!
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imzra
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imzra


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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyThu Jun 04, 2009 9:57 am

Quote :
If a tank is chain-pulling, he is clearly a jerk that doesn’t realize you need a full mana bar for every trash pull. In this situation, you should demand that he stop after every pull. For special emphasis, you should create a yell macro. If he doesn’t slow down any, as a last resort, just call him terrible.

<3 <3 <3
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Boobsie
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Boobsie


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Join date : 2008-03-17

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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyThu Jun 04, 2009 10:44 am

shironeko wrote:
In defense:

- I do not ask the tank to let me mana up unless it's before a boss fight. Even then, I don't wait till my mana is full.

- On mob pulls where skull is marked & there are three or more mobs, I cast blizzard, but skull is always selected so I can counterspell if they're healing. & yes, I do counterspell even at the start or the middle of a blizzard. (Although, sometimes, my interrupts are slow.)

Shiro's very thoughtful to tanks, always CSing (but decursing... mmmm hehe) ... however I tend not to counterspell or interrupt unless I know that spell is extremely critical, and might KO(or cripple) the tank. For example, in AN or Old Kingdom, the shadow spider caster. Or if the tank is weaksauce in HP and all that, CS > blink to tank > IB, which I perfectly understand when Shiro runs Heroics in the afternoon. *cough*

Counterspell can sometimes be dangerous in trash situations, becos it does create threat for you, and if the tank hasnt got enough threat on it, or fail to make it the main kill target, you actually make it worse becos the tank has to go after it for you, or will sorta screw the party mechanics.
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Boobsie
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Boobsie


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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyThu Jun 04, 2009 10:56 am

But the article is really funny and in many ways true.

I have seen far too many caster dpsers standing right there, continually dpsing and wait for tanks to "get it off me, get it off me".. haha classic.
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shironeko

shironeko


Posts : 519
Join date : 2008-04-15

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PostSubject: Re: Also for Shiro   Also for Shiro EmptyThu Jun 04, 2009 11:40 am

Boobsie wrote:
Shiro's very thoughtful to tanks, always CSing (but decursing... mmmm hehe) ... however I tend not to counterspell or interrupt unless I know that spell is extremely critical, and might KO(or cripple) the tank. For example, in AN or Old Kingdom, the shadow spider caster. Or if the tank is weaksauce in HP and all that, CS > blink to tank > IB, which I perfectly understand when Shiro runs Heroics in the afternoon. *cough*

Counterspell can sometimes be dangerous in trash situations, becos it does create threat for you, and if the tank hasnt got enough threat on it, or fail to make it the main kill target, you actually make it worse becos the tank has to go after it for you, or will sorta screw the party mechanics.

I don't know if this is in my defense or it's just to further prove that Shiro = fail mage. LOL.

But I decursed 51 times in H Sapph! /flex. More than double the next guy! (I think everyone knows this by now 'coz I've been going around telling everyone about it. So silly. LOL.)

I know counterspell generates threat. Don't worry, my IB is bound to my mousewheel. Scroll up = IB. MUAHAHAHAHAHA.
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